What is a holy kiss?

Date: August 22, 2012
To: The Body of Christ
From: Aldwin Naruse
Subject: Daily Devotional Journal
Re: Holy Kiss

What is a“holy kiss?’

In light of our last document that we wrote regarding “Hugging and Kissing in the churches,” we were directed to do research on the topic of “holy kiss.” We see pastors and church leaders use this term casually, but it is not certain if the intended meaning of this term from the Bible is really understood.  Therefore, the Lord has led us (husband and wife) to do further research and a study on the “holy kiss.” Here is what we found.

Keywords to define here are “holy” and “kiss.”  “Holy” means a fitting sanctity, godly, pious, pure from evil contact, ceremonially pure, without spot, sacred, associated with God, sincere, pure. (Zodhiates)

Holy means separated from sin, consecrated to God, sacred, often presented in a way which involves divine demands on the conduct of believers, forsaking sin, living a holy life. It is characteristically godlikeness.

Holy means free from anything inconsistent with their calling as saints. (Strong’s)

A kiss of charity -

There was to be an absence of formality and hypocrisy. Freedom from prejudice arising from social distinction, from discrimination against the poor, from partiality against the well to do. In churches, masters and servants would salute each other without any attitude or condescension to one another. The kissing took place between persons of the same sex. (Strong’s) Greek word for “kiss” is Philema (Strong’s)

Kisses were in common form of affectionate greeting for family members, intimate friend, or those who were objects of respect. Due to abuses in subsequent centuries, the church limited the practices of liturgical kiss of fellowship to men kissing men and women kissing women. (Keener)

Different Kinds of kisses
1. Deceitful - 2 Samuel 20:9-10, Luke 22:48

2 Samuel 20:9-10 (AMP)
9 Joab said to Amasa, Are you well, my brother? And Joab took Amasa by the beard with the right hand {as if] to kiss him. 10 But Amasa did not notice the sword in Joab’s hand. So [Joab] struck him [who was to have been his successor] with it in the body, shedding his bowels to the ground without another blow; and [soon] he died. So Joab and Abishai his brother pursued Sheba son of Bichri.

Luke 22:48  (AMP)
48 But Jesus said to him, Judas! Would you betray and deliver up the Son of Man with a kiss?

2. Insincere - 2 Sam 15:5 (AMP)
5 And whenever a man came near to do obeisance to him, he would put out his hand, take hold of him, and kiss him.

3. Fatherly - Genesis 27:26-27 (AMP)
26 Then his father Isaac said, Come near and kiss me, my son.
7 So he came near and kissed him; and [Isaac] smelled his clothing and blessed him and said, The scent of my son is as the odor of a field which the Lord has blessed.

4. Friendship - Exo 18:7, 1 Sam 20:41

Exodus 18:7 (AMP)
 7 And Moses went out to meet his father-in-law and bowed in homage and kissed him; and each asked the other of his welfare and they came into the tent.

1 Samuel 20:41   (AMP)
41 And as soon as the lad was gone, David arose from beside the heap of stones and fell on his face to the ground and bowed himself three times. And they kissed one another and wept with one another until David got control of himself.

5. Esteemed - 2 Sam 19:32-39   (AMP)
32 Now Barzillai was a very aged man, even eighty years old; and he had provided the king with food while he remained at Mahanaim, for he was a very great man.
33 And the king said to Barzillai, Come over with me, and I will provide for you with me in Jerusalem.
34 And Barzillai said to the king, How much longer have I to live, that it would be worthwhile for me to go up with the king to Jerusalem?
35 I am this day eighty years old. Could I now [be useful as a counselor to] discern between good and evil? Can your servant appreciate what I eat or drink? Can I any longer enjoy the voices of singing men and women? Why then should your servant be still a burden to my lord the king?
36 Your servant will only go over the Jordan with the king. Why should the king repay me with such a reward?
37 Let your servant turn back again, that I may die in my own city and be buried by the grave of my father and mother. But here is your servant Chimham; let him go over with my lord the king. And do to him what shall seem good to you.
38 The king answered, Chimham shall go over with me, and I will do to him what seems good to you; and whatever you ask of me I will do for you.
39 So all the people went over the Jordan. When the king had crossed over, he kissed Barzillai and blessed him, and [the great man] returned to his own place.

6. Sexual love - Gen. 29:11, Song of Solomon 1:2
Genesis 29:11  (AMP)
11 Then Jacob kissed Rachel and he wept aloud.

Song of Solomon 1:2 (AMP)
 Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth! [she cries. Then, realizing that Solomon has arrived and has heard her speech, she turns to him and adds] For your love is better than wine!

7. Illicit love - Proverbs 7:13
Proverbs 7:13  (AMP)
13 So she caught him and kissed him and with impudent face she said to him,

8. False religion - 1 Kings 19:18, Hosea 13:2
1 Kings 19:18  (AMP)
18 Yet I will leave Myself 7,000 in Israel, all the knees that have not bowed to Baal and every mouth that has not kissed him.

Hosea 13:2  (AMP)
2 And now they sin more and more and have made for themselves molten images of their silver, even idols according to their own understanding [as it pleased them], all of them the work of the craftsmen. To these [very works of their hands] they speak or pray who sacrifice to them; they kiss and show homage to the calves [as if they were alive]!

9. Holy love - Romans 16:16, 1 Cor 16:20
Romans 16:16  (AMP)
16 Greet one another with a holy (consecrated) kiss. All the churches of Christ (the Messiah) wish to be remembered to you.
1 Corinthians 16:20  (AMP)
20 All the brethren wish to be remembered to you and wish you well. Greet one another with a holy kiss. (Broomall)

Commentary:
“Greeting, by means of a kiss, appears to have been a common practice in the early church, and to have been followed for some centuries after the beginning of the Christian area. The custom is mentioned by Justin Martyr, Tertullian…Augustine, and numerous other early writers….According to the historians of the early church, the abuses to which the practice would ordinarily lead were avoided by the separation of the sexes when the church assembled for worship, an arrangement inherited from the synagogue…” (A Commentary on the New Testament Epistles by Guy N. Woods, Vol. 7, pg. 136).  The early synagogue already knew that this “holy kiss” may be abused, so they separated the sexes in churches. Men sat on one side and women sat on the other side of the church. How great is that. The church knew that there are people (men or women) who would take advantage of this holy kiss in the church.

The holy kiss ( Romans 16:16, 1 pet 5:14) which later entered the church liturgy was an expression of christian love and was presumably restricted to ones own sex. (Marshall)  Here, another author is saying that the holy kiss is “restricted to one’s own sex.” That means, if you are a man, you can only kiss another man and same with the women. I have never been to these churches in the Bible times, but I think that they really took much preventive measures. They understood human appetites and provided restrictions. They really kept the church holy and pure.

“Then let the men give the men, and the women give the women, the Lord’s kiss. But let no one do it with deceit, as Judas betrayed the Lord with a kiss” (The Constitutions of the Holy Apostles, Book 2, 57, page 422, Vol. 7, The Ante-Nicene Fathers).

Again, another confirmation here that the holy kiss is to be expressed within the same gender, not cross gender. Amazing. The different writers are saying pretty much the same thing.

Upon examining the article entitled “Kiss” in Smith’s Bible Dictionary, we see that it was customary to greet one another with a kiss during the apostles’ time. It still is in many countries today. But this kiss was not something God commanded the apostles or anyone to do. It was merely a custom; a salutation.

Notice that it was not a command from God. It is merely a custom (man-made). That means, God did not mandate this church practice. And if we do not engage in the holy kiss, we have not sinned.  Today, one may view the modern tradition of shaking hands as being equivalent with a “holy kiss.” This is a more acceptable greeting in our society.

There are four places in the New Testament that refer to the “holy kiss”—Romans 16:16; 1 Corinthians 16:20; 2 Corinthians 13:12; and 1 Thessalonians 5:26. In each instance, the Greek words denote a kiss which is sacred—physically pure and morally blameless. It was a common custom in most nations for people to kiss each other at meeting or parting to display their love, sincere affection, and friendship for each other. The kiss is called "holy" to distinguish it from a sexual one and from a hypocritical and deceitful one, such as Joab gave to Amasa (2 Samuel 20:9) or such as Judas gave to Jesus when he cried, “Hail Rabbi,” and betrayed Him into the hands of His enemies (Matthew 26:49).

I believe there are reasons—higher principles—which may require us to obey Paul’s command in a different way than actually going about kissing one another. The higher principle is this: “Avoid every appearance of evil” (1 Thessalonians 5:22). In our culture, kissing means something quite different from what it meant in the days of Paul. If kissing one another would cause some to stumble or cause unnecessary offense to the gospel, then it may not be the thing to do.
http://bible.org/search/apachesolr_search/holy%20kiss

To avoid every appearance of evil is a command from the Word of God. So we are to avoid this at all costs.

Whether or not the holy kiss should be a tradition we carry on today is not clear in Scripture. Whether or not our salutations to our brothers and sisters in Christ include the holy kiss, the important thing is that our greetings spring from real love and friendship, be characterized by sincerity, and represent true Christian fellowship.  Isn’t this the sole purpose for greeting our brothers and sisters, which is from real genuine love, friendship, sincerity and true fellowship? And if so, isn’t there any other way that we can express this genuine love and unity for one another?

In our culture, Christian unity may not be best demonstrated by a kiss. There may not be a way for us to greet others with a kiss which is truly holy. If not, then let us find some way in which to demonstrate our unity. One way is to open our homes to those believers who would not normally be invited into the intimacy of our restricted privacy and fellowship. Culturally, this would be shocking to those who wish to preserve and promote our differences. For Christians, it would be an excellent way to demonstrate the greater unity we have in Christ in the midst of our differences. Some outside the faith, who would claim us as a part of their culture or group, will undoubtedly be angered. Let it be so. Christian unity must be something we not only declare in concept but demonstrate in our conduct.

Holy kiss, like some other practices with symbolic meaning that change from culture to culture such as foot washing or head covering for wives. Holy Kiss would not convey the same meaning today  that it did in the first century and in most cultures, it would be seriously misunderstood. Such commands are best obeyed by substituting an action such as a handshake or bow, depending on culture that would convey the same meaning in a modern context. (Dennis)

If we take the word of God literally and not look at the latent meaning which is to examine the depth, the width and the height, we would only see the literal context. We will miss what the Spirit is saying through the Word of God. It would develop into a religious practice. It will be abused if taken literally. This is operating by the letter of the law and not by the Spirit. There is no discernment involved. Taking things literally on the surface is very dangerous. It must be discerned.

In conclusion, we have found out that the “holy kiss” was intended as a customary greeting in the early churches. It was never a commandment, but merely a tradition. Also, it was intended to be expressed between people of the same gender, meaning men with men and women with women. The apostle Paul’s intention for the holy kiss was for the purpose of Christian unity. It was never a commandment mandated by God Himself. It was a greeting gesture and man perverted it by including hugging and kissing in churches today and using “the holy kiss” as their basis of justification. It is clearly a perversion.

Today, some preachers and pastors use this term “holy kiss” too loosely. Their interpretation and application are indirectly causing people to sin. If we are to imitate our church leaders, and be under their spiritual leadership, we must examine the Word of God, line upon line, precept upon precept to understand the real truth of the matter. If our interpretation and application of Scripture are causing church members to sin, God will hold us accountable. And we must answer to God and make full disclosures of the spiritual conditions of the souls that we were entrusted with.

As under-shepherds of the Lord Jesus Christ who is the head of all churches, church leaders must make accountabilities of what they are teaching. This error must be addressed and corrections made for the sake of the Body of Christ at large. Once the Holy Spirit has brought an understanding through the Word of God, repentance is in order. Church practices should adhere to the Bible’s intended meaning instead of denominational traditions and beliefs.


Aldwin and Wendy

P.S.  Sorry, guys, no endorsement here for you to freely kiss the girls in your church.  


Work cited
1. Marshall, Howard I., A.R. Millard, J.I. Packer, and D. J. Wiseman. New Bible Dictionary.
Downer's Grove: Intervarsity Press, USA. 1996.

2. Zodhiates, Spiros, Hebrew Greek Keyword Study Bible, Chattanooga: ANG publishers, 2008.

3. Vines, W.E., and Bruce, F., Vine’s Expository Dictionary of Old Testament Words, Grand Rapids,
MI, Baker Book House Company, 1981.

4. Dennis, Lane T., ESV Study Bible, Wheaton: Crossway, 2008.

5. Strong, James, the New Strong's Expanded Exhaustive Concordance, Nashville: Thomas
Nelson publishers, 2001.

6. Broomall, Wick, The Open Bible Expanded Edition. Nashville: Thomas Nelson publisher,
1985.

7. Keener, Craig, IVP Bible Background Commentary New Testament, Downers Grove, IL,
Intervarsity
Press, 1993.